Thursday, November 15, 2012

Come on, Obama!

Well, Barack Obama's threenager approval rating just dropped a point today as Olivia became distraught about his lack of concern over our broke ass Internet.  Like many Americans, Olivia was very concerned about what Barack Obama could do for her - namely, could he fix the Internet so that she could watch Beyonce on YouTube without interruption? 

Because a tax plan/health care/foreign policy/debate zingers = irrelevant if you can't shake your threenager booty to Single Ladies upon demand.

In the car, on the way home from school...

Olivia: who's coming to fix the Internet?

Me: the cable guy.

Olivia: what's his name?

Me: I don't know!

Olivia: BARACK OBAMA!!!!!!!!

Me: no, I really don't think his name is Barack Obama.

Olivia: well, yes it is.

The cable guy shows up....

Olivia: Hi HI HELLO HI!!!!

Cable guy: well hello!

Olivia: what's your name?

Cable guy: Allen.

Olivia: :::frown::: :::tears:::

Me: she was expecting Barack Obama.

Allen: huh. Sorry, kid!

But then it was all better because Allen became fast besties with Olivia even though he had to turn the cable off in the middle of Ratatouille OMG. 

Allen: 2016 hopeful?  We'll see!  All I know is, Allen can fix the Internet and therefore we all love him like bums love bologna sandwiches.

--

I'm going to see Breaking Dawn Part 2 tonight and I am excited and I don't care who knows it.  EXCITED.  Can't get enough of that sparkly vampire shit.

--

One Year Ago:  Monday Perspective
Two Years Ago: The Rotund and the Nauseated
Three Years Ago:  Out Longer Than In
Four Years Ago: Kick Tease
Five Years Ago: PUPO

10 comments:

Kim said...

Don't worry Olivia, Elise is heartbroken that Mitt Romney lost and is driving us CRAZY! Mom, why do you think he lost? Mom, is Obama going to give you money? Mom, do you think he lost because he didn't come to our house for dinner? Mom, do you think Mitt Romney likes princesses and Gangam Style?!!? Kids...

The Lamentings From A Slow and Joyful Descent Into Madness: said...

That is great! All the Single Ladies VOTE ALLEN FOR PRESIDENT! I see a great campaign! She is funny!

Shanny said...

Go Allen 2016!!!!
If you can do important shit for our future kids, you have my vote!

Enjoy Breaking Dawn... I have to wait until tomorrow, darn kids get in the way of my sparkly vampires... you think I can get Obama or Allen to watch them tonight? lol

HereWeGoAJen said...

Is it sad that I thought "well, always working internet is a political platform I could get behind!"

kdactyl said...

Seriously...you make me laugh. Olivia sounds like a little spitfire too. How fun it must be to be her mom.
kd

Wendy said...

Cries... Take me to BD with you!

Amy said...

Adorable!

Anonymous said...

My Monkey is addicted to Gangnam Style... I'm not sure if that's better or worse than Single Ladies when on repeat times a million!

Carrie said...

Bring antacid to Breaking Dawn. I saw it all night and was all :::yawn::: I'm tired. This is kind of boring. Rob and Kristen still aren't great actors. Reneesme's cute. Jacob's hot. :::yawn::: OMG WHAT JUST HAPPENED!? WAIT! WHAT?! WAIT!! AAHHHHH! :::breaks out in a sweat then dies:::

Ellie's Mom said...

I live in Massachusetts, therefore a Patriots fan. yesterday was Patriots day at my daughters pre-school. Last night I was asking her if she knew any patriots names. "Barack Obama"!!! She yells.

Um. what are they teaching her?

Love your blog